EP. 043
How do you connect with grandchildren who live on their phones? We share real strategies for bridging the generational gap — and why it's worth the effort to meet them where they are.
"You don't have to become a TikTok star. You just have to be curious about what your grandchild loves — and let them see that."
Full Transcript
Welcome back, grown folks. Today we're talking about grandparenting — specifically, how do you stay connected to grandchildren who seem to live in a completely different world? A world of TikTok and Discord and whatever the next thing is.
And I want to start by saying — the gap is real, but it's not insurmountable. Every generation has had to figure out how to connect across age differences. Our grandparents didn't understand our music either. But they showed up, and that mattered.
Let's talk about the platforms. TikTok is short videos — usually funny, creative, or educational. Instagram is photos and short videos. Snapchat is messages that disappear. Discord is like a group chat but more organized. You don't have to be on all of them. But knowing what they are helps.
And honestly, the best way to learn is to ask your grandchild to show you. 'Can you show me what you're watching?' That question does two things: it shows you're interested, and it gives them a chance to share something they love with you.
My granddaughter showed me a TikTok last month about the history of jazz. I was genuinely fascinated. And she was so proud that she'd found something I'd enjoy. That was a real moment of connection.
The content on these platforms isn't all bad. There's a lot of creativity, humor, and genuine learning happening. The issue is the volume and the algorithm, which can pull kids into rabbit holes. That's worth talking about with them — not lecturing, but having a real conversation.
Let's talk about activities that bridge the gap. What works?
Cooking together is huge. Teaching them a family recipe is passing down culture in the most tangible way. And kids who might not sit still for a conversation will talk your ear off while they're stirring something on the stove.
Games — both old school and new. I've played video games with my grandkids. I'm terrible at them and they love that. They get to be the expert. That's a different dynamic than they usually have with adults.
Storytelling. Asking them to interview you about your life. Kids are naturally curious about history when it's personal. 'What was it like when you were my age?' is a question that can lead to hours of conversation.
Now let's talk about the hard part — screen time and boundaries. How do you handle it when you're with your grandkids and they're on their phones the whole time?
I have a simple rule at my house: phones go in a basket when we sit down to eat. No exceptions, including mine. And I explain why — this time is for us. The phones will be there when we're done. Most kids actually respect that when it's consistent and when you hold yourself to the same standard.
And pick your battles. If they're on their phone in the car, that might be fine. If they're on their phone during a conversation you're trying to have, that's worth addressing. But you don't have to make every moment a teaching moment.
The bottom line is — you don't have to become a TikTok star. You just have to be curious about what your grandchild loves and let them see that. Curiosity is the bridge.
That's the word. Until next week, stay curious, grown folks. The connection is worth it.
See you next time.